There is No “Still Friends” Immediately After a Break-Up.

    Once you break up with someone, no matter whose decision it was, you MUST give the relationship some time and space. Things need time to settle.  Attempting to go from lovers to  friends right away is a most naive proposition.  Most have come to this realization after their first few breakups.  However, for those who have yet to learn this painful lesson the hard way, by all means spare yourself by heeding my advice here.

“When It Rains, It Pours.”

WHY?!? Because when you are confident, busy and fairly aloof, that is when you are your most attractive.  This concept has nothing to do with being an a-hole or unapproachable, it simply is a result of your self-assured ability to independent.  Think about it, what’s more sexy than a person who is comfortable with themselves and unlike 98% of the population, not desperate.

“Appearance is Everything” – Truth in Cliches

Unfortunately, this is true. You have made up your mind about somebody within the first 5-10 seconds of seeing and or talking to them. Of course eventually one is going to require more depth then looks alone and a good first impression, but you don’t GET the chance to show off your amazing personality and well-roundedness if you don’t make a good enough impression to begin with.

Less is More: Market Theory Applied to Affection.

Disclaimer: I am certainly not advocating being an asshole-recluse; but explaining a basic human behavior, its general effects and the motives behind it. There is a time and place for everything, and always in moderation.

     The basic principle is that the less you give, affection, praise, material gifts, time etc.- the more weight it has when you do.  Think about it.

STANDARDS- Make ‘em and Keep ‘em

   For this, I use employ pole-vaulting metaphor. You have to set standards. There must be a certain level of treatment and respect that you demand from everyone in your life—especially anyone you are dating and so on. If you don’t raise the bar, so to speak, and require to be treated with the utmost care and respect, you won’t get it. Naturally people are lazy and inclined to put in the minimal amount of effort required to attaining a goal. And generally it makes sense, why spend more time and effort than necessary? Afterall, “time is money.” 

L.A. Lunch Dates

The Porch Restaurant (House of Blues), Sunset Strip. Delicious down-home Cajun style cooking served in a vibrant Louisiana country-house veranda type setting. The Pan-Seared Voodoo Shrimp and White Chocolate Banana Bread Pudding are to die for!! 
http://www.houseofblues.com/venues/clubvenues/sunsetstrip/dining.php

 
 

Terrific L.A. Date Ideas

The Magic Castle. An evening of magical enchantment. If you can find a way to get invited to this up-scale highly exclusive member’s only club, it is an experience you will never forget. Magic and mystery exist at every turn in this extravagant and whimsical establishment.

Diatus

DIATUS (dye-ey-tuhs) noun: Also known as a “dating-hiatus.”  A temporary break from one’s dating or love life.

   Recently I have come to the conclusion that the dating system is flawed.  At least for those who swim in the post-grad pool. 

   Here’s how it used to work: You have classes with someone,  run in the same circles, or have some other organic social connection that provides ample interaction and the ability to get to know and befriend that person first; and out of that pre-established compatibility develops romance.

Pick Your Poison- Looks AREN’T Everything

Here is why dating in Los Angeles is so challenging. It is because good-looking people (Gap commercial quality and above) generally fall into one of these categories: