7 Jul

Disclaimer: This list is certainly nowhere near comprehensive, but here are some of the most common signs and signals that should tip you off that a certain person is into you ~


1) Forcing a prolonged interaction. For example, you ask a simple question and they attempt to prolong the exchange by any amount of length after the question has been fully answered.

They may add some little comment afterward, or come back with a question of their own. Taking advantage of any opening to create a more substantial interaction or engage you in conversation means that they are interested in you, enjoy your company, and will try to make the most of any chance to interact with you.  **Classic guy move.

2) Willingness to do little favors for you. This also includes going above and beyond the favor you have asked. In particular, if they take it upon themselves to do you a favor before you even ask. They are doing what they can to gain your interest, and/or impress you by showing that you pay attention; that are someone who is there to recognize and take care of your needs. **Classic guy move.

3) Eye contact. If they make eye contact more than once within a few moments they are certainly at least checking you out, if not blatantly letting you know they like what they see. Unless of course, there is something on your face or in between your teeth, you can usually take this as a signal of interest.

4) Impeccable attention to detail. This includes remembering random things you’ve mentioned, or simply in the way they listen to what you say– like hanging on every word (even over a crowded room). Another and even more telling example is where you aren’t even in direct conversation with the person, but they look over anytime you make a comment, or show particular interest in what you’re doing. Breaking one’s own stride to pay attention to something you are doing shows that they are a) preoccupied by you and b) willing to abandon their own agendas for a chance to interact with you.

5) Creating inside jokes/secret sharing. This is a way to establish both trust and exclusivity in a nascent relationship. Sharing secrets or little inside jokes is an attempt to have something special between the two of you which, in a way, creates or at least seems to create a deeper bond or level of friendship.

6) Finding any reason to touch you. Things such as “incidental” hand touching (like as you hand them something) or brushing a crumb from your clothing etc.. One of the most classic moves is the shoulder/arm grab or slap to emphasize a point. This is of course completely unnecessary but is often one of the first, albeit usually subconscious moves someone will use when they are attracted to you. Now if this same move makes its way to the leg area, that’s usually on purpose; and clearly, a much more overt attempt to express interest. Rule of thumb, when a person seems to constantly find a reason to touch you, no matter how innocently, this is a signal of interest. *Though men and women tend to employ this one, women more so.

7) Taking/asking to wear something of yours. If they ask to wear or take something from you such as a hat or ring etc., is almost always an implicit invitation to make-out. This is a baby-step to being close to you. If they can’t literally be close to you, people will often settle for substituting an item that represents you. Further, like #5 above, it’s a way to create a connection, but in this case, it also creates physical dependence as they will need to find/re-connect with you at some point to retrieve the item. **Classic girl move.

8) Significant amounts of trash-talking, or otherwise giving you a hard time. Even if it is seemingly negative attention, they are attempting to get your attention, maybe even a rise out of you, thus possibly invoking some passion along the way. This one is pretty common as it is a relatively safe way for someone to get your attention when they aren’t quite ready to put themselves on the line yet by way of more obvious flirtation… Or so they think.

9) When everything you do is cute, or adorable. Need I say more??? Take my word for it, this person is smitten.

10) Getting nervous or goofy around you.  A sudden lack of cool due to your presence is a clear sign that they care enough about you (and what you think of them) to suddenly become self-conscious.  **Mostly applicable to men as they are usually the ones making the romantic overtures.

11) Making an effort to keep in your field of vision whenever possible. This is a common gym or office tactic when more obvious signals may be inappropriate. Though sometimes employed with an abundance of hopeful glances, skilled flirts will pretend like they don’t even realize you’re in the area. Nonetheless, the idea is simply to make sure that you see them. They want you to notice them, and how attractive, funny or interesting they are without having to actually direct their attention at you personally. This is just an indirect way to say, “Hey check me out.” One may attempt to achieve the same result by speaking or laughing loudly when you’re around. Same objective: Notice Me!

12) Constant name-dropping (yours).  I’m not sure exactly why this happens, but it’s true.  Where the other person excessively uses your name in casual conversation, you can bet they are definitely into you.  For example, when a simple “How was your weekend?” would suffice, the person nonetheless says, “How was your weekend, Stephanie?”, “Ok Stephanie, that sounds good,” “Talk to you later, Stephanie.”  Yeah…this person is smitten.


  1. Anonymous June 9, 2011 at 8:24 pm #

    OMG yes!! Guys do that somehow always in your area at the gym all the time. I’m like, I get it dude, I see you. Just not feelin it!

  2. Sosie June 9, 2011 at 5:29 pm #

    Solid work


  1. My Theory of Unilateral-Horizontal Attraction: A  theoretical cheat to knowing  who  likes you. « Dating, Debating & Recreating: Los Angeles - September 25, 2010

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